2004-01-25T15:25:00.000-08:00

Update on how many Masters I have had. I have now had 5 Masters. I believe that a Master and slave can find love and happiness together. That is what I am looking for.

2003-11-09T21:24:00.000-08:00

A Master who I am considering as my new Master, asked me to send him this in an e-mail, it looked good so I decided to upload it here.

My current slave situation:

My duties: cook, clean, work on web page, fix computer problems, work at the pub across the street for grocery money, I buy all the groceries and household goods with any money that I have, have to be available for him if he wants to screw me or beat me or cum on me or in me, I get the car in the morning so he doesn't have to walk very far to get in, I get the paper in the morning, I run every morning, I remind him to pay bills, I work on his accounts.

What was suppose to happen and what actually happened: I was suppose to be his wife and the mother of his children, that is what he convinced me he wanted. I am bisexual and the plan was suppose to be that he would marry me and we would have kids and another slave to play with and help with the domestic chores and watching the kids. I told him on the phone that divorce was not an option, I would rather be dead than divorced. And he agreed with me that we would never get divorced. When I got here he changed everything. And he finally did admit that he did lie about the divorce thing. We had agreed on total honesty but he has been lying to me and deceiving me from the beginning. The reason that I think he lied to me was he was desperate to own a real slave and none of the other women he talked to fell in love with him. When he realized how honest I was and that I really did love him, he lied to convince me to move to New Zealand. He keeps me pretty much financially screwed so I can't get home on my own, or get anywhere for that matter. I am working on ways to get my money safely stuck where he can't touch it, but any cash on me he knows about and makes me use to buy him things. He rarely uses me anymore sexually, he jacks off on the phone talking to this vanilla girl named Kelly. He told me he wanted a slave, but he claims to be in love with Kelly and she isn't into this lifestyle at all. He is a sadist and he likes to see women humiliated and degraded, especially seeing women forced to screw animals. He won't make me do that because he wants kids from me. His exact words are he wants to keep me to run his businesses and to breed me. He missed the day we were suppose to get married. I don't want to marry him no matter what now. I do love him, but he doesn't love me and I told him I was leaving my other Master, who was my second, because he(my 2nd Master) told me he didn't love me and never would and if I was waiting for him I was wasting my time. So I am still looking for a Master who can love his slave.

What I have been searching for since 1997: A Master who wants me as his slave, wife, lover, friend and mother of his children. I would like to have the kind of wedding my Mom would have wanted me to have, she is dead. I am a slave not because I am emotionally and psychologically messed up, but I am a slave because I studied martial arts with a sensei who tought all aspects of martial arts and a non-martial art was essential for a well rounded warrior. The lifestyle of a slave is my chosen art form, and it is how I express my heart and soul to someone I love. It is only part of who I am. But my current Master doesn't even want to know anything else about me. I know computers, I work on web pages and I am a slave, that is all my current Master cares to know about me. He doesn't even know that I study martial arts or what form or why or anything like that. I think a good Master should be interested in knowing more about his slave, am I wrong? There is so much more to me than being a slave.

My fantasy: My dream wedding actually has aspects of bondage in it. Using fishing line, so no one knows, I am immobilized enough that only my arms from the elbows down can move and my feet can move enough to walk down the aisle. Even my head is kept from moving much. The wedding takes place and the reception and all the while I am still bound, only me and the groom know what is going on. Under the wedding dress, I am bound with a crotch rope holding an anal plug in my arse, and keeping my vagina held open and a knot is right on the clit constantly rubbing. I am also wearing a corsett underneath. I wear a lace ribbon around my neck, as a collar but it looks like it goes with the wedding dress. As for the rest of the fantasy, I act like myself in public, but I have no problem being slapped in public if I deserve it, likewise, waiting on my Master hand and foot in public is also quite acceptable to me. Being submissive in public is no problem, but I am not submissive to everyone. I have been told I am intimidating and aggressive by nature. It was a shock to everyone who knows about my lifestyle that I am a slave, they would have thought I would be a dominatrix because of the impressions they had of me. I am confident and in control of myself. I couldn't be a good slave if I was a total lame brain wimp. By the way, did I mention my first Master taught me to have an orgasm on comand? I can have an orgasm being stimulated in other ways as well of course, but he taught me to have an orgasm with just being ordered to do so. I have been told this is not a common ability.

2003-10-28T21:58:00.000-08:00

I am a 24/7 slave. I have had three Masters. I have learned a great deal from my experiences. I have also learned what I don't want and what I do want and feel that I have the right to chose my own life. Some may not agree with this. Some may think that as a slave I have no right to chose. You would be wrong!

BDSM My Interpretation....from a 24/7 slave.